Thomas Fletcher (fletch31526) wrote,
Thomas Fletcher

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For a while now, my shower has been on the one-hour drain program. I take a shower and one hour later, it drains. Over time, this has been leaving a build-up of sediment and crud on the bottom of the shower that resembles some sort of prehistoric sandstone formation. You'd think I'd have a problem with that. But you'd be wrong. Since I'm damn near blind to the point of having to wear glasses to sleep, I can't see the dirt when I shower sans specs. I'm a big fan of a closed shower curtain the rest of the time, so the dirt goes unnoticed until I have overnight guests with better than 20/200 vision.

Today, I got a bug up my ass to clean things that have otherwise sat dirty for weeks. The shower, obviously, was on the short list. Do you know how hard it is to clean and rise a tub that won't drain? Impossible, I tell you. Well, not impossible... But it requires a timeline that I'm not comfortable with.

I keep a stretched-out wire clothes hanger for such occasions as clogged drains. It was first stretched out at the old apartment and was such an important implement, that it made the journey here. I probed and prodded and pulled out a couple of small chunks of hair. Yet, the water -- about as nasty as the stuff they were swimming in post-Katrina -- still sat there. After several more attempts yielded nothing, it was time to go deep.

I pulled off the cleanout plate and sent my hook-ended hanger down into the drain. About five or six inches down, I hit something soft. Really soft. I mean, stick a finger into your butt cheek soft. I knew I'd found something. I pulled up and only brought out a few strands of hair. I shoved it back down, pulled it back up and again... barely anything of significance. On my third try, I felt it hook. When I pulled up, I felt resistance. As I pulled up on whatever it was I was yanking on, you could hear a suction in the drain. For a moment, I was literally afraid to pull this all the way out for fear that it might actually be alive -- some sort of sewer eel.

I gave it one last tug and out the mass came... Wow. I think I'm going to have to take this by wildlife and fisheries to have it tagged. Well, except that I'm not sure it's furbearer season here -- it might have been an illegal harvest. I promptly measured the blob -- some eight inches long -- and took photos to forward to the Book of Records. Afterwards, I celebrated my kill with a shower where I wasn't standing in water up to my calves.

Watch this space for photos of the blob. I'll LJ cut 'em for the weak of heart. Heh.

(X-Posted to too_much_info)

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