I was scribbling on a scratch piece of paper while waiting for my computer to do something (it feels like I have to wait for it to do anything). Without thinking, I wrote the words, "theme is a place..." What does that mean? Hell if I know.

"I don't know about anywhere else, but I reckon right here in the Delta, a man spends about 70 percent of his time just waiting. Waiting on somebody. Waiting on something. Yeah, there's something in our life that we've been working on... sweating for... Chasing that elusive dream. Most of us'll keep waiting until our time here is over. Why? Because it matters. Sometimes I wonder if what we're really waiting on is ourselves. That maybe there is a whole lot of Joe down deep inside each and everyone of us. We focus so much on what we're waiting for that we miss or forget to appreciate what we got. Truth is, there'll always be something we need or want. Something we feel we have to have. Yearning for something missing. We could wonder how long it's going to take or how much one must endure. Or we could wonder if we're just wasting our lives waiting on Joe..."

- Morgan Freeman
Prologue to "Waitin' On Joe" video by Steve Azar

"As much difficulty as I'm having getting excited about John Kerry, the alternative is a pretty grim thought. I think at this point I'd vote for Vladimir Putin over Bush, if for no other reason than 21st Century Tsar tyrant wanna-be or not, the man's got the funniest name since Buotros-Buotros Ghali." Rob Rummel-Hudson of Darn-Tootin'

"Every man ought to be inquisitive through every hour of his great adventure down to the day when he shall no longer cast a shadow in the sun. For if he dies without a question in his heart, what excuse is there for his continunace." -- Frank Moore Colby (1865-1925), American editor, essayist

"We're not here for a long time.
We're here for a good time."
-Huey Lewis

ME: You've seen Bull Durham?

ALEX: I own it.

ME: So, you know that scene where Susan Sarandon sends the note down to Crash through the little bat boy or whatever? And Crash writes a note back and hands it to the kid and says, "this is personal, so don't read it." And the kid hands it to that girl -- What's her name? She's the one who fucks Nuke LaLoosh... Anyway. -- and she reads it. And then Susan Sarandon wants to know what it says. Do you remember that scene?

ALEX: Yeah, but I don't remember what the note said.

ME: It said...

ME SOUNDING AS SERIOUS AS I COULD: "I want to make love to you."

---

Somehow, that little dialogue doesn't sound as cool written out in an LJ entry as it sounded on the phone. Alex said that when I said "I want to make love to you," she could feel it inside her. Wow. That's cool. I guess my high school speech teacher was right... I am an effective speaker. Heh.

Our conversations were interrupted several times by things like dead cell batteries and emergency calls (I'm at work)... so we actually had about a half-dozen or so phone calls between us tonight. Doing the rough math, I think we talked for about five hours total counting them all. What the hell? I haven't done that since high school... when I was dating... um... uh... Jessie. What's really crazy is how totally honest I'm being with Alex. I'm not even sure what I want from all of this, but I know that I'm putting a lot more of me out there than I ever have before. She promised tonight that she wouldn't hurt me. Here's hoping that we can both make & keep that promise.

From High Fidelity:

Rob (John Cusack): I'm just sick of thinking about it all the time.

Laura (Iben Hjejle): About what?

Rob: This stuff -- Love and settling down and marriage and, you know... I just want to think about something else. That other girl or other women, whatever... I mean... I was thinking that they're just fantasies, you know. And they always seem really great because there's never any problems. And if there are, they're cute problems like, you know, we bought each other the same Christmas present. Or she wants to go see a movie I've already seen, you know. And then I come home and you and I have real problems and you don't even want to see the movie I want to see, period. And... there's no lingerie, and --

Laura: I have lingerie.

Rob: Yes you do. You have great lingerie. But you also have the cotton underwear that's been washed a thousand times and it's hanging on the thing and... and they have it, too. It's just that I don't have to see it because it's not in the fantasy. Do you understand? I'm tired of the fantasy. Because it doesn't really exist. And there are never really any suprises. And it never really--

Laura: Delievers?

Rob: Delievers. Right. And i'm tired of it. And i'm tired of everything else for that matter. But I don't ever seem to get tired of you.

"I can see now I never really committed to Laura. I always had one foot out the door, and that prevented me from doing a lot of things, like thinking about my future and... I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments." - John Cusack as Rob Gordon in High Fidelity.

I met up with an old friend Thursday night and ended up staying up and talking until 5:30. Friday, I slept until early afternoon. Now, my sleep schedule is all wacky and I'm awake at 6:44 a.m. looking through old e-mail.

Among the things I've stumbled across is a Henry David Thoreau quote that Macy sent me one time... Saying that it sort of fit me. Perhaps. What do you think?

"I fear only lest my expressions may not be extravagant enough-may not wander far enough beyond the narrow limits of our ordinary insight and faith. I desire to speak somewhere without bounds in order that I may attain to an expression in some adequate to truth of which I have been convinced. From a man in a waking moment to men in their waking moments. Wandering toward the more distant boundaries of wider pastures..."

"Why can't you tell me these things? Why is it that you can tell all of this to a camera? You open your heart to a machine. I'm flesh & blood. I'm here for you... Anytime. Your silence isn't protecting me, Bob. I feel like I've already lost you... Like we've lost each other." - Nicole Kidman as Gail Jones in "My Life"

"We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens. It may only last a moment, an hour, an afternoon. But that doesn't diminish its value. Because we are left with memories that we treasure for the rest of our lives." -Unknown

"I can see now I never really committed to Laura. I always had one foot out the door, and that prevented me from doing a lot of things, like thinking about my future and... I guess it made more sense to commit to nothing, keep my options open. And that's suicide. By tiny, tiny increments." -- John Cusack as Rob Gordon in "High Fidelity"

"The world is moving so fast these days that the man who says it can't be done is generally interrupted by someone doing it." -- Harry Emerson Fosdick (1878-1969), American religious leader


"I am personally convinced that one person can be a change catalyst, a 'transformer' in any situation, any organization. Such an individual is yeast that can leaven an entire loaf. It requires vision, initiative, patience, respect, persistence, courage, and faith to be a transforming leader." -- Stephen R. Covey (b. 1932), American writer


"If anything is certain, it is that change is certain. The world we are planning for today will not exist in this form tomorrow." -- Philip (Bayard) Crosby (b. 1926), American writer

Fred LeBlanc's Rules For Life:

"Don't stick around with anyone who doesn't realize how special you are."
"Life is short, so have as much fun as possible."
"Believe in yourself and anything is possible."

"Are you with me?"