Originally published at Parenthetical. You can comment here or there.
Flour: Hi I’m Flour. If you take me home, I can make you feel good.
Erin: My, but that flour is fresh!
Flour: No really! I have no gluten, I won’t make you hate me. You might even love me because I let you eat bread.
Erin: Oh, well, in that case, nice to meet you.
Flour: And you as well. Did I tell you I can fill many roles, as well as become many rolls?
Erin: I knew that actually… You come in a LOT of different forms. Almost too many one might say…
Flour: But I’m so much fun to work with! I think you and I would work very well together! Please work with me!
Erin: I think maybe we should just be friends. Someone else might work with you better, but I’m not great at baking except for those few things I did really well with Glutenous Flour… I’m not really in the baking mood anymore now that Glutenous Flour has betrayed me and caused me so much pain and discomfort.
Flour: Oh… well, I understand… I guess I could just get someone else to work with me and then you and I can hang out together afterward… But don’t you think you could just give me a chance? I’m not like that Glutenous Flour. I swear! Just give me a chance, and I’m sure after we work together awhile it’ll be like we were friends our whole lives!
* * * * *
I got a bunch of gluten-free flour… as you can probably tell from that picture up there. The experimenting will commence soon, probably will results and more pictures. I miss bread. I really really really miss bread. But I can’t eat it if it has gluten in it, and I really don’t like rice bread. You would laugh if you knew how old that loaf of rice bread in our fridge is… you know, the one with just a piece or missing from it. Several loaves just like it have gone the same way, so I’ve decided to stop trying to like it and figure out how to make some bread myself.
The thing is, I used to make great bread. Like really good bread. Squishy, chewy, crusty, fluffy, light, tasty bread. I’d already been having problems making it down here, and was attempting to figure out why LA won’t let my bread by yummy when I found out about the gluten issues. So imagine my frustration when I realized I would just have to make my own bread… without wheat flour.
I don’t know how. Not even a little bit. I don’t know about the qualities of the proteins in the various flours, and the books I’ve looked through and blogs I’ve scoured all have recipes. I’ve found thousands of recipes, but with no knowledge of the qualities of the ingredients, I don’t even know what I would expect from the recipes, so I have no way of choosing one over the others. To make matters worse, most of the recipe authors either haven’t expressed an opinion on rice bread, or they actually like it and are making bread just for the fun of it.
Okay, yeah, yeah. Bread making can be fun. I used to have fun with it. All that flour, that smell, that taste! Of course I loved it!
Anyway… The experiments are forthcoming. We’ll see if Flour is as good as he says he is. We’ll see if he really does know how to make me feel good. At the very least, he brought his friends Gluten-Free Oats and Gluten-Free Stealcut Oats, and I’m sure they’ll be fun to hang with.
Oh that other friend sitting next to him… That’s Reading Greek, one of my Ancient Greek textbooks. I love Ancient Greek, but I will rave about that later.